These tips are all about getting the key aspects of your profile right. The benefit of this is that you are clear about who you are and the type of guy you are looking for, which means that you immediately eliminate all the people who would be of no interest to you. This saves time and money on email, phone calls and pointless dates, not to mention the emotional toll it can take. It is an investment in your future, and well worth the time and effort.
So, you have bitten the bullet and joined an online dating agency, maybe two and entered maybe a basic profile. Hopefully you have chosen a clever user id. 'Sal1234' is hardly memorable, but something like 'MustangSally1' or 'FranTheArtLover' certainly is. If you haven't then it is easy to get another free membership offer. Here are some top dating tips for writing your profile - these will make the whole process much more enjoyable (and less costly) for you. Concentrate on getting the 'narrative' or 'About Me' section right. This is the free format area where you write your personal essay. Effort here will pay dividends, cutting out the guys you will not want to meet and attracting the guys who will are looking for someone just like you.
Tips 1-4 will help you write your online dating profile. But don't write it and then publish it straight away. Write a draft or two and allow 24 hours between each version. The final version will be much, much better, guaranteed! Do check spelling and punctuation - most word processing software will do this for you; then cut and paste the final version into the box on the profile.
Top Dating Tip #1 - write a 'catchy' tagline (the tagline is the profile header which shows in search results). For example 'Smart lady seeking fun and travel with a steady guy'. This says something about the type of person you are and also sets out the type of person you want to meet, right at the outset, encouraging guys to click and read your profile. You might not like the idea, but you are advertising yourself, and you do want to attract the right people for you by getting them to click and view your profile. Do be accurate about yourself though. Obviously if you hate flying, then saying you love travel is potentially misleading.
Top Dating Tip #2 - try to visualise the kind of person you seek and find eight, ten or a dozen key words or phrases (positive and negative) which describe that person, eg steady, loyal, loving, money not important though it helps, must have his own hair, like dancing and pets, no gamblers or heavy drinkers. Use past relationships as a guide - what was good and what was bad.
If you have been involved in a difficult relationship in the past, don't forget that there is a tendency for women to be attracted to features they recognise from past partners (even bad aspects), so make sure you eliminate such people at this early stage. For example, you may have been involved with a 'cold fish' in the past, so 'must be tactile and like hugs' could be an important phrase for you to include.
Top Dating Tip #3 - what's important to you? List the things that are important about yourself and that you want him to appreciate. Are you athletic? If so, you probably need someone with an interest in participating in sport (not sitting in a bar with a beer watching football). Are you an art lover? If you are, then a guy who thinks Monet is French for loose change is probably not the one for you. Aim to get under the surface to find guys with similar values to your own. People with differing values automatically have a source of tension between them.
Top Dating Tip # 4 - what's vital in your life? What about children - do you want them, maybe you already are a parent? Whilst there are boxes in the profile for this, you may want to say more. He will have to enjoy taking a parental role (and you may have his children for sleepovers). For example "my children are central to my life and a guy who is closely involved with children of his own and understands and enjoys the challenges of parenthood would be ideal'.
Maybe you are involved in local politics or a campaign or action group - these tend to be driven from deep within a person - so it will be important that you highlight that aspect of yourself.
Top Dating Tip #5 - use a professional photograph, preferably one in which you smile - a gloomy picture will just scare people off - 'she doesn't look very happy'! It is surprising, but people do post off-putting pictures of themselves. Invest in your online profile by using a professional photographer for your first online picture. A good photographer will aim to make the best of your features with proper lighting and background. This is so important. The picture is the first thing men see and men are very visually driven. The difference in response level will be as much as 20 times. If budget is an issue, then pick out those photographs of you that you think are good, and ask a friend to pick the best one.
If you concentrate on these online dating tips and get your profile focused and clear, with a good photograph, then you can look forward to meeting the right guys. You will save yourself time, money and maybe the heartache on no-hope dates.
(c) 2010 Phil Marks
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