The New Dating Game – They Aren't Your Mother's Rules

Are you trying to navigate the dating game, and sometimes wonder whether you are playing something without knowing the rules? Can you figure out how to meet the right guy and build a relationship? Does it seem like a different world since the previous generation met, paired off, and had families? If you are thinking that the rules have changed, you are right. Here are a few ways to play the dating game now.

The old rules:

It seems like it must have been a very long time ago that a woman needed to be a good housewife in order to find a good husband. In one sense, this really wasn't so long agowe are only talking about a few decades here. And, of course, there are still stay-at-home wives and mothers today. On the other hand, the whole mentality of learning how to manage a home and raise children is ancient history when it comes to the new dating game.

Now, for the first time in history, people really can choose a partner based on personality and attraction. The old rules existed because there was a real division of labor between men's work and women's work. However, technology has made most of this labor obsolete. Everyone, men and women, can choose the life that they want in the new dating game.

The new rules:

Even if what you really want is a family, there are new rules to this game. Independence and uniqueness, along with the confidence that go with those qualities, are what attracts men. Cooking, cleaning, and sewing are simply not a part of the equation anymore (well, cooking doesn't hurt).

While it might seem like physical attraction is more important than ever, it's also true that mental qualities are crucial as well. The emphasis has shifted away from people's abilities as providers or housekeepers to personal affinity. Finding the right match is more a matter of a couple's attraction and ability to communicate.

Even the methods of today's dating game have changed. If you still feel that there is a stigma to dating online, for example, you should really update your thinking. There are so many options out there; and the only way to find them is to use the same technology that provides us with our options in other arenas. If you don't, you are restricting yourself to chance and luck.

When you do meet someone special, don't worry about rushing into commitment and marriage. It is far more important to be circumspect, and to make sure that the new guy is really the great guy you want to spend your time with. Take it slowly, and really get to know him. Focus on your personalities, and on whether or not you can both really talk to each other.

When you are together, work on having fun. Relax, and have a good time. When you are comfortable in each other's presence, you can then work on opening up to him. Show him you can trust him by letting him in on your thoughts and feelings sometimes.

While you are letting him know who you are, don't forget to listen to him. You need to let him open up to you at the same time that you are opening up to him. The bottom line is that the new dating game is all about personality, so focus on that if you want to be successful.